Car craziness

One thing I like to analyze is the names car makers give to some models. For example:


Citroen C4

Who in his right mind would name a car after an explosive?? What's the slogan: "Citroen C4: Speed, luxury and ability to fuck up a Sherman tank"? Then again, it's a sound business model; buy car, blow up, need to buy new car. Oh wait... I just blew up! Crap.

(Note to self: must not hire Navy seals for marketing dept.)




Mitsubishi Pajero

This is too easy. Really - PAJERO????? Do you guys know absolutely NO spanish??? Let me suggest some names for next models;

- "Mitsubishi Wanker. Show everyone the loser in you"
- "Mitsubishi Jerkoff. You WILL enjoy this ride! (tissues included)"

Ford Fiesta

I like this one! Finally a car designed for parties. If it's a party of four that is. Ok, I can think of ways that can be fun. Maybe a joint venture with Mitsubishi: the new Fiesta Wanker! Maybe not...

Chrysler Neon

Only available in Miami, Vegas and surroundings of the Conrad in Punta del Este. Glows in the dark!

Daihatsu Charade

Yay, charades!! Makes for a great interactive campaign: "Two words! First word: 8 letters. First letter:..." Zzzzzzz.....

Other names:

- Datsun Bluebird: what if I want it in red? Will it fly away? Do I need to keep my cat away from it??
- Ford Escort: that's what I'm talking about! You other carmakers should take notes and sell your cars with escorts too.
- Honda Civic: it will never start a fight
- Mitsubishi Colt: don't mess with me!!
- Peugeot Boxer: when will you put your pants on??